(A Note: The title of this entry comes from Frank O’Hara’s “A True Account of Talking to the Sun at Fire Island,” one of my favorite O’Hara poems, my favorite being, of course, two O’Hara poems: “Ava Maria,” which blew my mind with the amazing possibilities it presented for language and poetry and pretty much everything when I read it for the first time in 8th grade, and “Why I Am Not a Painter,” which I read directly after “Ave Maria,” as it was the next poem in the anthology, and was again flooded with wonder in re possibilities and language and so forth. Ever since then, I feel a thrill when I hear the words “gratuitous” and “sardines.”)

My amazing writing students!

As the title of the blog post suggests, it is nearly time to say goodbye to Bowling Green and to VAMPY and to my VAMPY campers, or Vampers.  I’m thinking that my campers are probably experiencing some of the same emotions I once experienced when in their situation: relief and excitement and great anticipation for the Three Great Events of VAMPY: talent show, cryfest, and the final dance.  And, near the end of every camp, there was that terrible feeling I remembered feeling as a child when going to the beach with my parents: the realization that time is passing, and that there is little you can do about it, even though you desperately want to put your hand on the arrows of the clock and stop it.  The last few days of VAMPY were always filled with feverish excitement and exhaustion, fueled by pure adrenaline and the desire to savor every last second, to make the most of every single remaining moment.  I’m thinking that my campers have many of the same feelings and fears that I did at their age, and in their situation — nerd camp was pure heaven for me, as it was the first place where I felt that I really and truly fit in, and had the great blessing of being around people who were like me day in and day out.  It was the first place in which I felt I could be myself, no matter how dorky and be-spectacled and somehow at the same time spacey I managed to be.  It was the place that, in many ways, made me, as in being myself, and in such a public arena, I feel that I became myself.

It’s been more of a joy than I could ever describe, being part of this again, and being reminded of the importance of education and also of the classroom as a place that allows for difference, and accepts it, and therefore allows every student to be who they are.

It’s nearly time to wrap up today’s class so that the students can head off to their final optional activities — a.k.a, mandatory fun — and talent show practice and, then, the final study hall.  I must admit that I’m  heading home for a quick nap.  I’ve been thinking a great deal about a great many things — from teaching to poetry to whether or not I really can live without cable to just how amazing seasons two and three of Buffy the Vampire Slayer still are — and will probably overwhelm the blogosphere soon.

In the meantime, you can find a poem of mine up at Guernica this week.  I’m beyond proud to be part of this issue, which is absolutely amazing.  Be sure to check out the interview with Junot Diaz as well, as it is awesome — and, also, coincidentally, titled “Nerdsmith.”